I need some God to sink deep into. I need to immerse myself in his goodness. Dedicate myself to something bigger than what I can see.
But where do I find him?
In good friendships, in the wilderness, in the sunset, in the ocean, in our families, in the feeling of complete calm before you fall asleep. In the sun streaming through the window when you wake. In the feeling of sand between your toes, and grass tickling your ears. In love. But is that enough? I know he is there and I feel him in those moments of pure beauty. And that's how I know he is real. But am I missing out on something he has for me? Do I need to have some super spiritual lifestyle? Or can I just enjoy him in the simplicity of everyday life, and by living everyday in a state of prayer?
Because that I can do. I can see myself happily accepting that there is a wonderful God. And I can see myself speaking with him daily. But much further than that I wouldn't know where to begin.
Many people opt for the "simplicity of life" relationship with God, because it's easier. It never enters into that uncomfortable stage of intimacy and the chance that God would require something of them.....
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there is so much more. there are these moments that we have with God after we press into him, that we cannot duplicate anywhere else in life. We cannot fake them, or forget them.
There is no other road to the beautiful thing we call intimacy with God..except, well, intimacy.
But that intimacy can be found in a life of prayer can it not? I'm not saying I will just live my life separate from God yet acknowledge his existence. I want to know him, I want the intimacy I once had and far more. But at this point all I know how to do is speak to him and live my life in awe of all that he is.
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